


cruel joke

by orphan_account



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Arab Character, Arranged Marriage, Bisexual Female Character, Blow Jobs in a Car, Bondage and Discipline, Breathplay, Cheating, Child Abuse, Dark Character, Depression, Drinking, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Insomnia, Lesbian Sex, Light Bondage, Manipulation, Masturbation in Shower, Muslim Character, Past Sexual Abuse, Phone Sex, Polyamory, Premarital Sex, Public Masturbation, Recreational Drug Use, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Semi-Public Sex, Slow Burn, Smoking, Suicide Attempt, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-03-30 20:07:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13959048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: ameerah  has lived through 7 suicide attempts , she is so broken to even try to die again , nothing can bring her back or push her away from her existence, now she doesn't give a fuck   , she will live by her rules to the best of her ability , a bisexual progressive female nerd living in a  religious country this might as well be an alfa/omega/beta  vers with all the misogyny sexism and homophobia .





	1. before the morning prayer

**Author's Note:**

> this is a story that doesn't represent the country i live in , but does represent the society i live in accurately as religious factions and tribal laws and social statues affect life differently   
> this story relate closely to events in my life and some close friends

Still and damp with sweet under a heavy blanket ,ameerah can hear her sisters breathing on their mattresses to her left and right , she cant move yet but the heat is suffocating her to no end , someone must have turned the ac off after they slept . Her hands are so numb moving them is an ordeal , she stumbles her way up from the mattress careful not to step on the tangle of sheets and body parts of her sisters.

still heavy with sleep and barefooted her sweaty feet slip on the smooth floor, she falls smack on her forehead ,that didn’t even registers on her shit scale and she just grunted ,shot back up ,went to her old room to pick up a towel then headed back to the furthest bathroom away from her sleeping family ;she is going to masturbate .

 

She turns the shower head and gets herself clean her hands wander teasingly brushing her right nipple she squeezed it gently, its not enough to do anything but perk her nipple ,ameerah wants to take her time with it , no rush ,there is at least two hours until the first prayer of the day no one will wake before that . She gives herself a scalp massage, then after conditioning her hair she takes her fingers to her clean body she presses on , watching the water drops on her thighs follow her fingers down to her knee her hands go back up her thigh and then to her ass she cups it with both hands ,starts kneading it a little then gives herself a smack on one cheek ;oh she bites her lip and moves her right hand to her other lips .

 

She keeps her fingernails clipped so short ,spreading her lips apart with her thump and middle finger she lets her index teas her clit softly ,she leans on the wall cups her mouth with one hand “shit” she mutters , her head on the wall reminds her of the dull ache on her forehead, but her finger is now her whole hand, going over her clit and her labia just caressing and pushing and pulling until she started panting and she could feel her wetness leaking ,she dips a finger then brings it up to her nose to smell , the earthy smell she knows of herself gets her knees weak she takes her finger in her mouth tasting it ,sucking on her finger , she drags her finger on her plump lower lip, the tip of her tongue darting to teas the last of her taste Ameerah is almost on her back now her shoulders propped on the wall behind her ,spreading her legs, her knees are pent since the shower space is so small there is no way she could straiten her legs ,which means her sex is spread open, she can touch every fold on her beautiful vagaina Taking the showerhead on medium settings to her clit she moves the stream downward to her opening ,it hurts a little but then its pleasure pure pleasure ,its all she can do not to beg for something she moves it back to her clit and starts moving it with a barely there circular movement and that almost sent her over the edge so she directs the stream on her lips instead ,today she will edge her self to completion , she sinks a finger into her vagaina with a gasp , she cant control how her throat is making whiny little noises that she bites her lips and hold her breath until she felt dizzy ,remembering to breath she lets out a gust of air that decompresses her lungs ,somehow with the relieve a low tremor worked it way toward her abdomen and thighs with al the tell tales of a shattering orgasm .

She goes back to directing the stream to her clit and start shuddering her pelvis is convulsing and her thighs are shaking all the way to her hip toes curling with the threat of her orgasm but she holds on and on and on ,rocking her hips involuntarily ,her muscles are aching now from the presser of trying to stay under the stream and not to move away .

 

She is cumming now Hard; cant breath can’t make a sound and won’t move the stream away she is determent to hit another orgasm right away and before she could even let out the breath she is holding she is coming down with another orgasm more intense than the one before it , her hands shaking her body is convulsing she cant stop it she lays there with water running and her muscles cramping hard , she is yet to be sated, in her post orgasmic haze she takes the shower head off and uses the hose on a gentler setting ,her sensitivity now turning pleasure to pain instead of the other way around . She direct the hose with its weak stream on her clit again .

 

 it feels dead scrubbed raw too sensitive like an open wound , pinching a nipple again trying to wake other nerves ending , to take her focus from the pain and turn it to sweet sweet pleasure , her leg are still spread wide but her feet are planted on the floor she is too tired to lift them again , Focusing on the sensation between her legs, she imagines her self strapped to a bed , with a magic wand taped to her abdomen and rubbing her clit raw as her dom drips lube into her body and if she kept her hips still that lube will find its way to her abused clit but if she kept squirming that lube will be wasted and her dom kindness will be for nothing, She imagines it and stills her her hips and takes the burn of the water on her sensitive clit until something gives and it’s all a war of control and well to keep her hand pointing the hose there she is Cumming hard and trembling this times she doesn’t come down she just keeps cumming again and again , by the forth orgasm she is panting and she blacks out Ameerah is now aware of feet walking about the house , she is blinking her eyes trying to shake the looseness in her body after an earth shattering orgasm , she stands then lean on the wall to steady her self while fixing the shower head ,giving her self a final scrub,maybe now she can brave the day better .


	2. Sunday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> past *child abuse warning *  
> also the clothing issue is subjective  
> it doesn't apply to all Muslim but it does  
> apply to our ameerah as her family  
> follow the strict teaching of certain Islamic scholars .  
> _________________________________________________________

Its 8 :30 on a hot hot Sunday ,the start of an annoying week to be honest ,ameerah is so happy she got to have fun after her shower since she has an algebra class back to back with Precalculus ,witch honestly is nobody’s fault but her own .

She made her bed and now she will lie in it, blame it on her control issues wanting to control when she suffers, against her academic instructor advice she lumped six hard and heavy subjects into one semester.

Sitting curled on herself in an old armchair, in the furthest room from her parents’ bedroom, it squeaked awfully with its age every time she stirred in it ,waiting for her dad pick her up for university ,since she is not allowed to drive or go alone with a non-guardian male.

 

Her dad called, finally ameerah gathered herself and her massive bag witch was her bag of rebellion, she plops into the car with a stupid thud in the passenger seat.

The silence is more stifling to her than the ions of clothes she is wrapped in ,her dad catches on her discomfort and turns the ac all the way up then turns the air vent to her side with silent nod eyes fixed on the road.

What her dad didn’t know is that her discomfort is not only because of her heavy abaya and her suffocating niqap, in addition to that she was wearing another abaya that sets on her shoulders then a tee shirt then a skirt to hide her pants.

Her family is more religious than most and they deem wearing pants on bar with committing a mortal sin which includes but not limited to killing an innocent human ,so hiding her offensive garments was a matter of life and death , at least in her family .

 

She looked over her dad after thirty minutes of silence and asked idly  “dad, mom started taking calcium supplements right?”

Her dad nodded slightly, eyes still fixed on the road not interested in his daughter inability to stand an hour without fidgeting around or rambling on

Ameerah ignored that and pressed on  “is it because of her thyroid or is it hereditary?”

Her dad let out a sigh “it’s her thyroid ,naturally, why would you think it’s hereditary, none of her family have brittle bones ‘ he had her full attention now .

‘I had it , I had it when I was young around 12 or 11 I was diagnosed ‘

‘no you didn’t , you were never diagnosed ‘ his voice annoyed now, her eyebrow shot to her forehead eyes big as saucers and her voice is a little higher ‘yes I was I broke my arm and the doctor said I needed calcium supplements ‘ moving her back against the door so now she had full access to her dad side view.

Her dad answers in the most nonchalant attitude ever as if he was not about to shatter her reality “you’re not 12 anymore ameerah, you were a healthy child you outwrestled your older brother and male cousins every time “he turns his head towards her. Stopping at a red light “your mom broke your arm, and you know that’

“I know that  dad “ she parked at him  without meaning too ‘sorry ,dad , I know I know what happened , but the doctor said- her dad cut her midsentence “ I know what he said , and that’s what the doctor agreed to write in your file, for my benefit’. Looking away from her now, the red light has gone green. He continues ‘and that’s what we told your teachers ‘      

“But why, why did you need to tell me that, I knew she broke it and you knew and the doctor knew, and my teachers knew, why lie?” she said quizzically her voice softening with confusion.

‘You didn’t just break your arm kid; you had multiple hairline fracture in your elbow joint too, the injury was defensive you were shielding your face when she hit you, look I know you are a screamer you never take a beating in silence .but no amount of screaming would mask the sound of a bone breaking . I asked your mom about why she raised her hand .she said you did not vacuum the living room correctly do you remember?’

 

Ameerah nodded, entirely focused on her dad wanting to see where he was going with this harrowing walk down memory lane.

her dad continue “ we had to tell her you had brittle bones so she would take a gentler hand with her discipline .so no you didn’t have brittle bones and get your stuff ready we are almost there’the last words were said with such finality  that she knew her dad had ended the conversation.

 She pressed her quivering lips together, now that her dad admitted to her that he knew about her abuse, her morning has officially begun, shitty as all her days.

 

She had half an hour before her class ,so she zipped through the limp flailing condensed dumb bodies crammed in front of class doors along the hallway, and ducked into the cafeteria took off her first abaya finally able to comprehend the fact she was still wearing it .

Looking around her everyone was wearing their shoulder abaya indoors even though there was no real reason in a girls only university , to her that was appalling, a sign of her oppression, the word sheep came to mind as she yanked at her second abaya with vigor scrunching her face at the sight of her stupid black skirt.

Once she was down to her jeans and tee shirt, with all her extra clothes shoved into her bag of rebellion, hating the way she stood out without the armor of the modest black garment , she flung her body at a chair in the furthest corner of the cafeteria her back to the wall her body facing the room with clear vision of both the counter and the door. 

Once her laptop was plugged in and turned on, she got some diet coke and a box of pocky chocolate sticks, even though she liked the lotte Pepero ones better, alas they did not sell them here. Reading a pirated copy of a song of ice and fire cherry picking the chapters under daenerys name only, giving the arya ones some rest.

The conversation with her dad easily filed away for a later time ,now daenerys has birthed fucking dragons ,ameerah is reluctantly aware of the time so she slams her laptop shut and luges her bag hurriedly to make it early enough for her to find a seat suitable to her mood

She sits the teacher teaches and the students learn, and it’s all a blur of “bored,bored,bored,”.   

All the math related bullshit is done after 8 hours of  pure agony ,she fidgeted to hell and back  slept woke died and lived a thousand times in that duration ,and now she gets to wait for her dad to pick her up while she sites silently in the cafeteria thinking about binaries and codes and many thought inducing things .

Unaware of the girls around her, or what they were yapping about she was definitely done and done with this god-awful Sunday.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
